For Miriam

My Dearest Miriam,

 I want to tell you that I am sorry. I have thought about you frequently since I heard your story on the news. I wish I could have shielded you from those bullets. I am so incredibly sorry that like so many other times change will inevitably come because a tragedy has occurred.

I have had a pit in my stomach all day thinking about you. I keep saying a thousand things over and over again to you in my head but they're not reaching my fingertips. I just keep coming back to

I am Sorry; I can feel your pain and it makes me feel physically ill...

Natachia Barlow Ramsey - Postpartum Psychosis Survivor and Loser